Mother's Day is a trigger of mine. It's been downhill all week. Mother's Day stuff is everywhere you look. I can't keep it together. I keep telling myself "if I can just make it till Monday I'll be ok.

Mother's Day is just another milestone I'm passing that reminds me I will never be a mother. I will never hold my children. I will never hear them call me 'mom.' I will never go to the first day of school. I just cannot bare the thought.

Every ones journey is different.

We all deal with our journey differently. I will never get over not having children. I do hope to learn to live with it someday. But not this week.

I want my children. I want to be a mom. I want to hold my children. And no car, no home in a good location is going to make me feel better.

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